Recently, everything that I have posted, I haven’t really liked. I made myself vulnerable just to write it. I felt like everyone who would read it would think that I was weak, that I wasn’t able to handle myself. Maybe they would think I was just dramatic, maybe they thought I was weak in my faith. I didn’t like it. I like for people to think that I have it all together, even when I don’t. I want people to look at me and think that I’m strong, not that I’m going through some heavy things. I don’t want people to think that I’m weak.
I was watching Scrubs today, and it gave me an epiphany that set my mind to rest. I’ve questioned for a few weeks why we as teenagers are so wrapped up in finding a girlfriend or a boyfriend. On the episode they showed a montage of people who we’re in a relationship. There was a young couple kissing, a teenage couple hugging, and an elderly couple dancing.
I don’t know how to go about writing this, so bare with me.
Have you ever heard the song “Walking Her Home” by Mark Shultz? The song tells of a guy who goes and picks up a girl for her first date. They end up getting married, and having a kid together. But when she dies, the love is still there and greater than ever. Basically what I’m saying, it that I have realized that it’s just natural for us to look for someone to be with. The comfort of having someone to be with, to hold, to laugh with and at, and to do life with is not something that we take for granted.
Don’t get me wrong, you should always seek God first, then you should go on to seek a mate. I think that tradition and society try’s to tell us not to date until we’re 18. But, there are many accounts in the bible when people we’re not 18 and God used them to change the world. If God thinks that people can be mature enough to change the world, I believe that he thinks we’re old enough to enter into a dating relationship.
I do however; agree with Pastor Matt and Martha, “you date to find your mate”. I feel as if you can’t see yourself marrying the person you’re dating, than there is no reason to be with them. I also feel like if you’re mature enough to be in a dating relationship, you should be mature enough to take on the biblical roles that the bible teaches us. If you’re not ready for that, you’re not ready to date.
I don’t disagree with high school students dating; I do disagree, however, on how we tend to go about dating someone. We always play the “I like” “I’m crushing on” game. I don’t think that we should ever play this game. What ever happened to courting the person you want to be with? If you just collectively come together and say you like one another and start dating, that’s not healthy. I think that we should first spend sometime with the person. You should first really get to know them. Whatever happened to going on dates, and then asking them “will you go steady with me?”?
I also think we should always pray about the relationship first, and make sure that you get you’re parents approval.
Well, there’s my 2cents, I guess.
Peace
6 comment(s) from you.:
Hey Joe! I just wanted to let you know that I never thought you were weak in your faith and to be honest I looked up to you. In almost every situation you put God first and thats something I struggle with. How strong you are in your faith still amazes me today! and everyone goes through some "heavy stuff" sometimes, that doesn't make you weak. I really liked your post btw. Although I'm guilty of playing the "I like" game, I still see where you're coming from on this. I love that song (remember we listened to it at Cookout! lol) and I definently agree with you on being mature enough to take on biblical roles too. I hope you're having a great summer and we should def get together again sometime! :)
joe i just wrote something about this in my blog. sept yours is way better. ugh.
but i agree with you!!
i think everyone does the "i like" game. well i do alot. =/.
and i love love loveeee that you said you shouldnt date someone if you cant see yourself marrying them. why date them just to date them? over the past 2 years i have found out that the "date to find your mate" is what should be.
basiclly, i loved this post haha.
Joe!
I loved your blog!!!
It was so amazing and so real.
Very wise :D
and by the way I'm pretty sure know one thought you were weak in your faith. If anything when I read them it sounded like you were becoming stronger in your faith. But thats just me.
Anyways loved the blog!
I love the fact that Scrubs gave you an epiphany. I love when we find God in everyday things. haha.
I totally agree with the seeking God first. It's not supposed to be about rules and regulations. For me, I haven't not dated because I wasn't allowed to date until I was 18 or because I was a firm believer of teenagers not dating (though I don't always think it's the smartest thing for the reasons you listed and for others.). Ha, it has always and always will be about having God guide and ultimately write my life. Like those people in the Bible story, they were ready to do whatever God wanted for their life (most of them, haha.), and that's when God showed them what He wanted. Case closed. Kinda simplified that way. :D
joe i have to say that i dont think you realize the wisdom you have. you understand things in ways i honestly didnt. and i let myself learn the hard way. i pray people read what you have written and learn from it. that they do not learn the way i have.
The "Case closed. Kinda simplified that way. :D" was for me, not you. lol, hopefully it didn't sound rude, it just simplifies it for me when I think about this subject. That for me, if I search for God first, what you talked about, He'll fill in the rest.
I pretty much agreed with your blog, with a bunch of extra words. lol.
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